ok..after having some chat with him...well i thought i would feel better after telling him what and how i feel..but i ended up to feel even worst...maybe its too early to say no to trying..so i wont say it at least for now..i hope i wont give up..eventho sometimes i feel like i wanted to...what if i end up to be like him...sick of trying and give up..and then feel nothing...but i know im not like that...i know im not that strong...but at least im trying my best...its funny tho...once u pray for it,then dapat,u dont want it plak...haha..maybe its true...God wants me to experience d exact situation...yea i dont mind...but im not sure if i am strong enuff to handle it...coz...i tend to give up easily...
hmm...
im just confused...and there are things that i cant just tell him straight...its like,i cant even open my mouth when it comes to something that i think might hurt his feelings...and i feel sgt kejam..for treating him dat way dlu...i wont forgive myself for that..and why laa cant u just tell me dlu...sumpah im so sorry...and see what i just did...i let everything out....everything...dont u ever suffer anything by urself....u know i wont forgive myself for making u cry...i wont..stop hiding your feelings...it will be a burden...just like u said...and im doing the right thing for letting it out...
raya break is over...im glad that i met u....and having the chance to see u even for 2 days only...i feel happy..sangat sangat happy...thank you for the beautiful gift...eventho i thought it meant something at first...hahaha that is sooo typical yana....treat me differently,buy me a gift,make me a card then i would say ohhh he is up to something..typical typical...but things are more clearer now.....i get it...
and i've been wondering if we can stay like this when you and me are back to college...i mean,if we get to do the things that we use to do when we are here...and not being able to do that when we are apart..im just too worried of losing you again..goshh..i'll be the happiest gal alive when i hear you say u love me again...put an end to all of these...or maybe im just aiming too high..maybe..
ahh...im tired...cant think straight....i dont know where all of those thoughts have gone...i am short of what to say already...maybe i should stop.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment